Joy of giving

When was the last time you experienced immense joy from making other people happy?
The last five years, I celebrated Christmas in Bangkok. I still remember spending my first Christmas away from home by working because Thailand does not consider it a holiday. My colleague was kind enough to understand that I must have been missing home so she played Christmas songs from her old portable radio. It just made me burst to tears.

Last December, I decided to go home for the holidays. But I must have been away for way too long that I started to ask myself, how does Christmas feel? Holding my warm cup of coffee and listening to the sound of the wind chimes, I reminisced my childhood Christmas memories; the surprise upon waking up to see bundles of gifts which my mother convincingly said were from Santa Clause; the fun-filled games I played with my cousins; the apples and candies hanged on the Christmas tree; that’s how Christmas was like for a child that was me.

Then my thoughts went to the thousands of children who may not have had the chance to open a gift during Christmas; children who were deprived of the experiences I was blessed with. Then and there it hit me, I knew what I needed to do for Christmas.

 

I immediately informed my Hilot family about my plan of organizing a kid’s party for Christmas. Blessed with a loving and generous family, my siblings and cousins from across the world responded pledging their support and financial assistance. On Christmas day, we gathered about fifty kids in the chapel. Not all these kids are less privileged but regardless of what they have or don’t have, they deserve to have a childhood where they can play together and enjoy each other’s company.

And of course Santa Clause is part of the celebration so our cousins dressed up as Santa and went around distributing sweets.

We also gave away two dozens of slippers to kids who need them most. The following day, one of the kid’s mom told us that his son kept his new slippers near the altar because he was scared that it will be stolen outside or the dog will play with it. Awwwwww (sniffs)

We organized various games. We also let some kids showcase their talents so that they will grow up confident. It is important for children to feel that their abilities are recognized. I was thrilled when my cousin’s daughter who I thought was a shy girl turned out to be proactive, she even sang Elsa’s Let It Go! Before we ended our little party, the kids gathered to sing “Thank You, Ang Babait Ninyo”.

We managed to give each of the kids a gift. The sight of their happy faces is just priceless. It made me feel guilty that I spend so much on expensive things I don’t really need when happiness is as simple as making other’s happy.
In the evening, I celebrated Christmas with my family. I have so much to be thankful for in life but what I am most thankful for is to have a family who showered me with so much love; a family who taught me that what matters is not money but charity; a family who values truth and fairness over fame and glory.

P.S the chapel is in the process of renovation. Donations will be most welcomed

If I had to live my life over

I read this from my friend Ate Mary‘s Facebook note and thought it’s worth sharing in my blog so others will be inspired too! Happy Tuesday!

If I had to live my life over by Erma Bombeck
I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the “good” living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather rambling about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have burned the pink candle sculped like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television, and more while watching life.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick, instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

There would have been more “I love you’s” and more “I’m sorry’s”…

but mostly, given another shot at life,

I would seize every minute … look at it and really see it … and never give it back.”-

Missing someone

Sometimes, traveling and other forms of entertainment can never fill an emptiness and all that’s left to do is stare at the horizon hoping that the wings of time will take us to a road that crosses theirs; thinking that they’re never really gone as long as we keep them in our hearts.

Koh Kret Island: Haven of Mon Tribe Artists

 Most people in Bangkok headed to the provinces to celebrate New Year. Because of that, me and my friend Neil decided to cancel our plan of unwinding in Kanchanaburi, a province in Central Thailand. We were desperate to escape from the fast-paced, city life in Bangkok and be one with nature but couldn’t think of any place as the crowd go to the countryside.

Our officemate Ying recommended Koh Kret Island where her Aunt lived. The word “island” stimulated my senses for adventure, relaxation and longing for the rustling sound of water as it reached the shore. Without much thought, we braved the glaring heat of the sun and made our way to the little land of the Mon Tribe, Koh Kret Island.

A blooper journey

Getting there wasn’t very hard. Since Neil haven’t really got around Bangkok by bus out of our laziness to get caught in a heavy traffic – and the irresistible convenience of taking the train- we decided to take the bus that day to Sapan Thaksin Pier which only cost us 8 Baht. A ride on Chao Phraya boat for 14 Baht took us to the last pier 30, Nonthaburi.

The adventure started after we got off the boat. According to the blog I read on how to get to Koh Kret, we have to walk about 50 yards – which brought that flying stars on my head, how far is 50 yards?- tsk tsk, I should have paid more attention to my primary lessons. Aside from the 50 yards, we don’t know what bus number goes to Pak Kret Market.

We asked a few vendors and no one seemed to understand us or could speak English well enough to give us the right information. I almost freak out and press the SOS button to call Ying. Finally, a woman told us to take bus 32 and by luck the bus stopped right in front of us, so off we go. Unfortunately, the bus wouldn’t go for reasons we don’t know as we can’t understand Thai that much, so we have to get off at the next bus stop and wait for another bus to come.

We were lucky to find a seat in the bus and the next thing we realized was we don’t know where to get off. I know it’s Prak Kret Market but I don’t have the slightest idea how to know it’s already Pak Kret.  Thanks to this guy who sat beside me, he got off at the same place and talked to the motorbike driver which took us to Wat Sanam Neua pier. From there we took the boat for only 2 Baht (I wish we have this price in the Philippines for a boat ride). It took us less than 10 minutes to get to the island.

The Island

Contrary to my imagination of an island – a parcel of land in the middle of the vast ocean with lots of trees, few inhabitants, no infrastructures and far from civilization just like those islands I’ve been to before- Koh Kret has almost everything there is in a town. They even have 7 Eleven, only that it is now abandoned, but knowing that it existed before is already something.

The first things that caught my attention were fried Santan and Bougainvillea flowers which I never dared to eat. We trekked towards the right side of the island where we found a mini park. We walked through the long array of shops selling various things creatively made by the Mon tribes. Since their expertise is on pottery, we marvelled at the creative pots most shops sell.

We were extremely fascinated by the creativity of the Mon tribes – from food to home decorations – it’s amazing how they came up with such beautiful styles. We stumbled upon an artist selling photo frames. He specifically chose photos of nature and put water and sand on the frame. Once you flip the frame upside down, the sand gradually drops to the bottom of the frame forming natural designs that looked like mountain ranges against the photo. I was in total awe of his creation.

Our last stop before heading home was a coffee place beside a narrow canal. It was very relaxing with its wooden motif. They served a really good iced-coffee that quenched our thirst and delicious fried bread with minced pork crumbs and fries. The jazz music in the air was an added treat!

Though Koh Kret was not as I expected from a typical island, the place, the warmth of the Mon tribe and their creativity that stimulated the lazy artist in me were more than enough to consider that trip worth remembering.

Are you proactive or reactive?

Stephen Covey’s book ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” has been on my shelf for the past 6 months. Though I’ve started reading a few pages, still I couldn’t get myself to finish it. Just this morning, I was thinking of what worthwhile thing to do without getting off from bed and spotted his book lying on the shelf beside me. So, I pick it up and started reading from the last page I’ve read.

The page title says “Proactivity” Defined. I was reminded of what my officemate told me few days ago; our boss commented that he is not proactive. But what does ‘proactive’ means anyway? And what do we call a person who is not proactive?

As I read through, I got to figure out the best word to define how I have been behaving for more than a year now and the very reason why I couldn’t finish reading this book and all the other books in my shelf, “reactive”.

Below is an excerpt of the book to give you a glimpse of how Covey differentiates a proactive and reactive person.

Reactive people are driven by feelings, by circumstances, by conditions, by their environment. Proactive people are driven by values – carefully thought about, selected and internalized values.

Reactive people are affected by their social environment, by the “social weather”. When people treat them well, they feel well; when people don’t they become defensive and protective. Reactive people build their emotional lives around the behaviour of others, empowering the weaknesses of other people to control them.

Proactive people can carry their own weather with them. They are value driven; and if their value is to produce good quality work, it isn’t a function of whether the weather is conducive to it or not.

Reactive Language                                   Proactive Language
There’s nothing I can do                            Let’s look at our alternatives
That’s just the way I am                            I can choose a different approach
He makes me so sa                                    I control my own feelings
They won’t allow that                               I can create an effective presentation
I have to do that                                        I will choose an appropriate response
I can’t                                                       I choose
I must                                                       I prefer
If only                                                      I will

Song of my heart

It was a serene starry night. The ocean breeze from Camotes sea blew a kiss on my cheeks. The man beside me strum his guitar and the music strewed with the caressing wind as the waves rushed toward the shore.

Reminiscing those wonderful moments I spent at the beach with Maru is my way of escaping from the solitude of life abroad. How I wish we can go back to the same spot where he first sung the song that made me almost burst into tears, the song that became his heart’s words.

Such memorable experience, the feeling of being loved, is one of the greatest things life can ever give us.

 

 

 Forever by The Ambassadors

I may burn out like a candle and
I may pass away
I may fall just like a shooting star
my heart will stay
I’ll be yours until forever,
forever I’ll be true to the promise
I have made from the day that
I found you
forever you’re in my heart
even if we’re apart

I say, forever I’ll be yours
forever I love you
I say, forever I’ll be yours
forever I love you
my love will never fade away
even if I’ll die and
I will love you until the end of time
even without your smile

So help me please I beg you
don’t walk away I need you
just stay with me and be by my side
take my hand and we’ll work it out

Until forever I’ll be yours
forever I’ll love you
I say, forever I’ll be yours
forever I’ll be true
my love will never fade away
even if I’ll die and
I will love you until the end of time
even without your smile

So help me please I beg you
to stay….

 

 

A life changed by a priest

Way back in college, I was occupied with so many responsibilities both academic and extracurricular. I traveled a lot around the country and meet different people, some of them are famous political and showbiz icons. I was actively serving the Youth for Christ and at times, serve as speaker in various youth camps. I was living a very fulfilling life and there was never a time when I feel “bored with life”.

The drastic changes in my lifestyle since I came in Bangkok last year was difficult to handle. My work as a writer failed to give me the sense of fulfillment I would have acquired if I work in a development organization.  Though I succeeded in my task of raising our company’s sales, still I feel I was not able to fully use my knowledge and skills. My job didn’t give me the kind of challenges that I fought with as a student leader; challenges that somehow brought out the best in me.

Finding people whom I can relate with was also very hard. When I talk about books, global issues, life and the likes to my friends, they would gradually drop the topic. These things left me feeling isolated. It gave me the chance to delve into the past and mourn over the mistakes and wrong decisions I’ve made. Not so long, I fell in the trap of depression. The fall was high and it was very hard to get up.

I was left wondering how I will find myself again; how I will put up the pieces of my “shattered life”. The support and love of my family and boyfriend Omar was the only thing I’ve got to cling on. However, they are far from me; I couldn’t fully express my feelings to them and they couldn’t comfort me as much as when they are around.

Behind the tormenting agony lies the hope that someday all these things will make sense. I was on the lookout for His message for me. I always believed that everything happens for a reason and that no matter how bad are the circumstances, God’s blessings will always unfold at the right time.

Despite these small embers of hope that keep on burning in my heart, still I feel as if I was lost in the wilderness; I need someone to bring me back on track. And just when I almost give up, I met this priest who changed my life forever.

My officemate and friend Marlar told me she will visit a priest confined in the hospital just few blocks away from my apartment. I learned that this priest came to Bangkok alone for an operation after a motorcycle accident. Thinking of his situation alone in the hospital without anyone to call except the nurses on duty, I felt an urge to come not just to visit him but to assist him until he is fully recovered.

The thought of helping him didn’t happen as planned. On the contrary, he was the one who helped me; the one who carried God’s light back into my darkened life.

He patiently listened to my silliest stories, most of which were negative experiences. The load I carry felt lighter each time I share to him the things that confuses and hurts me. It wasn’t hard to open up with him as he is able to fully understand even my unspoken words; something only very few people can do.

Each day I am in awe with his wisdom and compassion. Every act he did, every word he said was full of lesson and meaning. It amazes me how he understand each person, with its negative and positive side. It amazes me how wide his understanding is and how he profoundly view life. It amazes me how he used only very few words to answer the many questions I had in mind.

He taught me how to forgive others and my past. He taught me how to live a simple life anchored on wisdom and faith. He taught me how to love myself. He taught me how to love others the right way and how not to lose myself in doing so. He taught me how to cherish the past, dream for the future and live the present moment to its fullest.

This great man whom I considered my guru, spiritual adviser and father helped me put up the puzzle together and let me see God’s message. He helped me appreciate my past, both the painful and joyful ones. He molded me to become a strong and independent lady but never miss to pamper the child in me.

Who would have thought that my depression could lead me to a person who became one of my life’s foundations? Who would have thought that his accident would make him heal many broken hearts?

Indeed, everything happens for a reason and every downfall we experience are part of God’s plan to give us only the best in life. Our suffering can either bring goodness to ourselves or to others. But, one thing is for sure, everything He brings us is for our own good.

Just as flowers only start to bloom in spring, His answers will be revealed at the right time He set in heaven. Like a beautiful rainbow that appears after a storm, our greatest blessings come after our hardest troubles.

God will never give us a cross too heavy for us to carry. And when we are in pain, we are never alone. He always sends people to manifest His immense love to us. I will always be grateful of what He sent to me. He never gave me anything less.

Now, I will go on with life keeping the most valuable lesson I learned from my guru: Always look straight forward.

For everything, thank you so much Dadu.